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This doesn’t always mean that they’re an emotional vampire, but it’s important for INFJs to set boundaries until they are sure that the connection goes both ways. If you’re cubicle neighbor is constantly telling you about her marital problems, but changes the subject or turns it around and makes it about her when you mention a fight with your husband, you definitely have an emotional vampire in your midst.

While it might be hard to avoid certain people (like the cubicle neighbor) it’s definitely a good idea to set boundaries.

Otherwise, you could end up in a draining and one-sided relationship.

Let’s imagine that Sarah and Tom have been dating for a few months now.

Tom still feels very sure that Sarah is “the one.” However, Sarah is starting to feel like she’s not truly being listened too by Tom.

Most of their conversations revolve around Tom talking about his problems or ideas, and when she tries to open up to him, he becomes quiet and distant, or changes the subject.

And like a counselor, most people find it really easy to open up to us.This can create even larger problems when it comes to INFJs and romantic relationships.Imagine this scenario: Sarah, an INFJ, is going on a first date with Tom. Tom feels very relaxed and calm around Sarah, and the conversation flows easily.You rarely see or talk to your friend from college when she’s in a happy relationships with her boyfriend, but as soon as there’s trouble in paradise, she needs you to be there to listen to her vent.Emotionally needy people feel like they have to fill a void any time they lack emotional support, and INFJs can be easy targets.

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